Chapter 2: LA part 5 – The Frustration

28th of February

I read some more this morning at the hotel in The Urantia Book a book about universal wisdom. It is kinda funny as I write this now siting here in the car a couple of hours later in the hills above Universal Studios. To my left stretches the Universal Studios building with a huge title Universal and the globe logo.

I do not know what to do today. So I sit in the car overlooking Universal Studios when I suddenly have the inspiration of wanting to visit the strange looking building in different shapes and colors on the other side of the highway up on another hill. I began my drive toward the other side but suddenly noticed that the road lead to Universal Studios. I did a U turn and went back, then decided that I would anyway visit the studios. Bought a preferred parking ticket and parked right next to som of the shopping and restaurants. I went for a walk in the area and got some lunch at the same time. I noticed the movie The Recruit was running at Loews Cinema complex at Universal so I decided to walk around until it started at 2.50. I had one and a half hour before it began so I strolled around and came to the gate of the amusement section of Universal Studios. Since the price was $49 I decided not to enter at the time. I decided to instead walk about to the cinema complex and wait in the bright sun.

The Recruit is about being recruited by the CIA. The main character needs to go through a tough training before he is ready, even then he thinks he did not make it as the trainers asked him to leave. But he did make it!

I can see the symbolic meaning for my own life. As I feel like I am often times tested in my faith in trusting God. I felt very frustrated after having seen the movie, as I felt like I was being tested again. Once again I feel that I am to wait until I feel the movement from inside to guide me. Having God lead me forward again.

I drove back to the Travel Lodge in Hollywood where I spent another night in the same room I had the night before.

29th of February

I had dreams of renting a room and of being in a commercial, and of something very frustrating happening. It seems my dreams are reflecting what is in general going on at the moment.

I do not know what I will do today, or if I am able to rent from the house of 6 as they have not called me back yet. I even left a message on Thursday for them and do not know if anyone has listened to it or not. But everything is in Gods hands and if he wants me to rent a room there that will happen if not something else will happen. How many additional nights I will spend at this or another hotel I do not know, and leave that in Gods hands for the moment until I feel inspired to do something.

Friday night

It was Friday night and I walked up to Hollywood Boulevard and strolled along it for over an hour before I turned back. Most of the stores are either shoes or lingerie, and the atmosphere of the boulevard is one of poverty. I passed by some people wearing robes and singing Hare Krishna. I could see that they enjoyed themselves and probably some of the reason for that was that they were more or less entertaining people that passed them by. On the way back I stopped by a place where photographers were waiting outside. I asked what was going on and in a little while there was going to be held a Fashion Show inside the building, so I hung around for a bit and waited. I had noticed a girl and a boy about my age standing around waiting and they gave up and left walking by me as they did. The boy said something that to me sounded like Norwegian so I asked them if they were Norwegian “Er dere Norske?”. They stopped and it turned out that they are Norwegian so we spoke for a bit and the boy told me that he was holding an exhibit in downtown Los Angeles called “Re-Creation From Norway” tomorrow evening the 1st of March from 7-9pm. he gave me his card, so that I could always check it out if I had the time, and time is something I have lots of these days.

I walked back to where I had entered onto Hollywood Bouleward and in the same area across from Chinese Theatre there is another theatre that is used for theatre art shows. People stood outside waiting for something so I walked up and asked one of the guys working on what was going on. A guy from the Man Show is having is own show and people where waiting to enter. So I decided to wait as well. Most had already entered but some waited to see if there were any extra spaces left. After a wait of about 45 minutes we were told that there were not spaces left and might as well leave, but I waited around as the guy from the show was going to do his little entry beside the sign T.G.I.F and a actor with a white beard and white robe playing God. The entry took perhaps 15 seconds and the little show was over. I walked back to the hotel.

I had dreams of renting a place. Dreams of being in a commercial. Dreams of having my fingers cut off.